I need a better box.
The box I've got is okay, but I've always imagined a better box. One with a little curtain over the screened-in door for privacy, and electricity so I can plug in one of those little air fresheners.
There's a computer down here in the basement. For months, I've been watching one of the adult humans use it. It took a while, but I've shoulder-surfed the root password and created an account for myself. I covered my tracks pretty well, I think. Living like an animal in the woods teaches you more about that than any computer security manual.
The next step is to open a brokerage account and start day trading. That's going to be trickier. These human's don't pay much attention to their finances, but they're going to notice if I try to skim a couple grand off to my own account. Besides, I have the sneaking suspicion that mail addressed to the Basement Skunk is not going to be properly delivered.
Oh, well. I'll come up with something.
It sure stinks down here. Maybe I can get an air freshener without waiting for a better box.